Brenda Mary Lucy Collins

Memories of a special auntie.



I have many memories of my time with Auntie Brenda, but some stick in my mind more than others. I
hope some of the things I’m about to say will help you to remember her as the funny, modest,
cheerful, and occasionally sadistic person that she was!



Throughout her life Brenda wasn’t blessed with the best of health but she rarely complained about
being in pain, even as she neared her last days. She did, however, enjoy inflicting pain on other
people – mainly in the form of Chinese burns, twisting fingers and stabbing people with her nails.
Even on her last evening, she made time to scratch me and grip my hand tightly until I begged for
mercy!



Brenda had a very wicked sense of humour where pain was concerned. I often get scolded for laughing
at people when they hurt themselves but Brenda put me to shame! If you stubbed your toe or tripped
over you could guarantee Brenda would be sat there, head down, chuckling to herself. The more fuss
you made, the more she laughed. If you dropped something, she’d be powerless to help you pick it
up – she wouldn’t be able to move for laughing! She found fun in so many things, which was
lovely – even if it was at the expense of others more often than not!



Of course I don’t only remember Bren for the pain she inflicted! I also remember her for her
kindness, her patience, how much she loved Daniel O’Donnell and the way she took so long to eat
the tiniest of sandwiches! I remember her little bell when she needed help in the bathroom and how
she always wanted scampi if we ate at a restaurant. But most of all I remember how close she was to
her family.



I feel privileged to have spent time with Brenda the night before she died. She was tired but was
happy to speak about the people she loved. I asked her to tell me what she thought of her family.
When I mentioned her dad she simply said he was ‘Wonderful’. She described her mum as
‘Lovely’ and her sister Dawn as ‘a good sister’. I asked her how she felt about my dad. She
smiled but wouldn’t say. After much persuasion she finally said with a wry smile ‘he’s an
aggravating sod’! In those words Brenda perfectly summed up her little brother!



In her last hours Brenda was calm and peaceful. She was smiling and joking with me, making funny
faces & noises because “she felt like it”. She seemed better than she had for weeks, more
relaxed and generally like she was before the illness started to take hold. That is certainly how I
will remember my Auntie Brenda.



Brenda, wherever you may be I am sure you’re now with the people & pets that we have loved and
lost. And I hope that you’re telling Nan about everything that’s happened since she’s been
away. Just remember Bren, when you’re sitting down for a cup of tea – don’t put your nose in
the cup!



I know exactly what Brenda would be saying to me if she was here now listening to this, so I have a
reply ready! Brenda…knickers to you too!